Take the first step…it’s not that scary

You’re ready to start fresh. You’re eager to live your happy life. But, you’re scared. I. Get. It. 

The first step feels the scariest but sometimes anxiety is just excitement masking itself. Plus, if you’re over 50, like me, you can’t fathom the thought of wasting one more day dreaming of a different life. 

But isn’t not going after the life you want a waste of time?

The time is going to pass anyway so if you take the leap and it doesn’t work out, wouldn’t you have learned more than if you were to do nothing? Easy to say, I know, so how about this…think about the worst case scenario. If you can handle that, then what do you really have to lose?


Work on your self-confidence. 


It takes energy to look in the mirror and promise yourself to no longer accept less than what you are capable of. To let go of people who are not good for you, things that no longer serve you, and a past that just won’t leave you the f alone. 

But listen…someday it will be too late to do the things you want to do. And only you can do something about that. The people who you think are judging you aren’t even thinking about you. And who cares if they judge you? Screw them. All that matters is are you judging you?  So, I repeat:

Someday it will be too late. 

So, what good is holding onto a past that doesn’t matter anymore? And, I’m talking to myself also. Remember, I’m a work in progress, too. I have to remind myself on the daily to stop wasting time on nonsense. 


Learn to rely on yourself.


I used to have ‘crutches’ in my life: A man, a family member, a friend…whomever it may be, I had crutches. These were people I knew would rescue me if I messed up or couldn’t make it on my own. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have people you can depend on; of course we all need good people in our lives who we can call at any time. That’s what friends are for!!! However, having crutches in your life keeps you from fulfilling your greatest potential. It keeps you from trying harder. 

Do something that forces you to be alone. A solo trip, perhaps? I will always suggest this as it’s helped me tremendously.  A road trip alone can help build your confidence. When you only have you to rely on, you are forced to be strong, to figure things out, to change your own flat tire, for Pete’s sake.  This builds character, mental strength, and, honestly, makes you feel a little bit like a badass. 


Going away for months by yourself may seem extreme. But, let me tell you something…if you can make that happen – even for just one month – do it. Holy crap is it amazing. I chose a dude ranch; a place that was remote where I knew no one and I could clear my head and start fresh. It’s hard to grow around people who only see you as your past self. But, there are so many options out there. 


The trip you choose does not have to be extreme. 


Go away for a day or a weekend, somewhere close to home but not too close. Start small and build up. Or go big but don’t go home until you’ve completed your goal of ‘aloneness.’ No distractions is a great thing! 

Find your place. Take a step. Go into nature, turn off your phone, and be with yourself. I promise you won’t regret it. 


More later. Thanks for reading. 


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